Memory Lane

When I was young - sixth grade at the latest - I wrote a letter to a Bonnie A. from Port Coquitlam, British Columbia. I think I got her name and address from the back of a comic book where it said “pen pals wanted”, or something like that.

Anyway, I sent the letter off and she wrote me back. We wrote each other for years and even exchanged pictures (which I still have, believe it or not!) and cassette tapes, so we heard each other talking.

At the time, Bonnie had several pen pals but she was the only one I had. But something she introduced me to was “slam books”. Slam books were cut up sheets of paper that are stapled together to make a book. The person who made it decorated it up any old way they wanted to and each page had a theme. They might look something like this:

Page 1
Your Name
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

Page 2
Your Address
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

Page 3
Favorite Singer
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

You would go to each page and fill out your answer. If you were #1 on page one, you were #1 on page two, and so on.

The last page always said something like “when this book is complete, please return to:” and it would have the name and address of the person who made the booklet. There was almost always a page that asked if you were interested in new pen pals. If one said “yes”, anyone could start writing them.

Over time I started writing people from the books and at one point I had a pen pal from almost every single state in the United States. I got a lot of mail, every day. It eventually got to be too much and I cut back the number of pen pals I had.

First to go where the superficial “how are you? Write me back. letters. (That would literally be the extent of their correspondence.)

I ended up with five that were special to me (unfortunately I’m drawing a blank on two of their names and I hate that!). There was Bonnie, Kathy R from California, Aviva C from New York, someone from Minnesota (Sharon, I think but I’m not sure) and someone from Oklahoma.

Bonnie and I stopped writing each other when we were in high school. She wrote me a letter saying she had to stop writing. I never really understood why but I respected that and I still remember her fondly today.

The girl from Oklahoma, that ending was weird. She was a huge Elvis fan and after he died I only received one letter from her. She was telling me how much she had loved him and how upset she was that he’d died and the letter ended mid-sentence. I never heard from her again, despite sending her several letters asking if she was okay.

I’m not sure when Aviva and I stopped writing. I think we had graduated high school though. Same goes for the girl from Minnesota (although I wrote Aviva even longer than her).

Kathy though, we corresponded up until I got married at 21. I was willing to continue writing but I think she felt she was more of an intrusion - like it changed things. The first couple of years after I married I got a birthday and Christmas card but that was it. I think we lost touch because my ex and I moved around a lot those first few years. I always hated that - losing touch that is.

You’re probably wondering what the point of this long post is. Well, yesterday I had lunch with two co-workers and one of them asked me if I went to high school with someone and I didn’t know. So I pulled out my junior year yearbook last night to see if I could find this girl. (I didn’t.) While going through it, a letter I’d started to Kathy fell out and it brought back some great memories of the friendship we had - despite never having met face to face.

So, I guess the point (if there really is one) is that people you haven’t communicated with in decades, people you haven’t ever met face to face, can impact your life and still bring a smile to your face some 20+ years later, at just the memory of them.