This is how I want to do it

About online dating...it's not working for me. And I know why it's not working - for one thing, my heart's not in it. Readers of my blog and a few (very few) select friends know I've tried online dating. I know it's like the new way to meet people but I'm really not comfortable with the concept and deep down I've felt like if I did meet someone that way, I'd never want to admit that to the people who didn't know how we met - which is the mass majority of people. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with online dating if you want to do that - the problem is with me and I know that too.

Another reason it's not working for me is because I don't post pictures. I know men are very visual beings and with that whole "don't want people to know" thing working against me, I haven't been able to bring myself to post pictures. For a lot of men, that's a deal breaker - which is fine. But, here's the deal, I've been a paid member on two services and created a profile on a third (they still send you matches but you can't communicate with them). All three of the services have matched me with men I know. Yes, I know that that means they're signed up too but it still makes me uncomfortable and if they found out I had subscribed (I'm no longer a subscriber to any online service) to these services, I'd want it to be because I chose to tell them - not because they recognized my picture. Stupid? Yes, absolutely, but it's still how I feel.

But anyway, back when I was married, I tried to talk my then husband into taking ballroom dance classes with me but he refused. Shortly after we separated I started taking country western dance classes by myself. Then in 2000, I took swing and country western dancing with my nephew. And with Dancing with the Stars, it's really brought back the desire to take dancing classes. So anyway, a couple of weeks ago I pulled up Jessica Trapp's website and was looking around and was reminded that she belly dances (she's such a neat lady and so interesting!!!). Next thing I know, I'm googling "belly dancing classes Houston". I came across Dance Passion, a place that teaches not only Belly Dancing but also salsa, swing, country western, ballroom, hip hop and more. For me, I want group classes because private lessons are obscenely expensive and this school has group classes.

To make a long story short, a new session of classes started this week. I was interested in ballroom, salsa and belly dancing. The ballroom classes started on Monday but I was exhausted after work and couldn't bring myself to make the trek across town (no place near me offers classes - this place is 35 miles one way) for the class. I did, however, have the energy to go on Thursday for the belly dancing. It was immediately followed by the salsa class but I hadn't decided if I was going to do both. That is until I saw the big crowd waiting to get in to the salsa class. I figured if it was that popular, it had to be fun, so I signed up for it as well.

And here's where I get to the point of this post (yeah, I know, long way around)...they told us to find a partner. At the time I thought that would be the awkward part - the part where I felt like a loser because I didn't come with a partner. I didn't go look for anyone, instead, a tall, good-looking man approached me and asked me to be his partner. And for the next 30-45 minutes (before they made us start changing partners), he was my dance partner. He was nice. He was encouraging. And we had a good time.

But, the point is, we didn't have to fill out a 700 question compatibility thing or be compared on 29 points (or whatever it is) to find out we have something in common. We'd both signed up for the class of our own free will and without doing anything else, we know we have something in common. I like that - a lot. Is he going to be the next man in my life? Probably not. That's not the point. The point is, I don't have to do things that make me uncomfortable to meet people. If I just go out and do the things I like doing, I'm going to meet people with common interests without trying. All while having a good time to boot.

Bottom line, I think I'm done with the online dating thing. I know it works for a lot of people - and that's great - but it's not for me. I'd rather meet someone in a situation where we know off the bat that we have a common interest and see where that takes us. If it goes somewhere, great. If not, that's okay too. But in the meantime, I'm still having fun. And that's really what it's all about now, isn't it? :)