I'll start this with doing what Mel does on her blog when she's going to maybe reveal things that others may not have seen yet.
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Okay, so are you watching The Bachelor this season? My friend got me hooked a few seasons ago and I keep telling myself that I'm not going to watch but I just can't not watch for some reason.
But tonight a couple of things stood out. Did you catch that Jonathan had a rose before Ali gave out the final rose? Yet when Chris came out to announce she had one last rose to give out, Ali hadn't given him one yet. I know they edit it to make it more . . . whatever . . . but if you're going to edit it to look like he got the last rose of the night, don't show a shot right before that where he clearly has a rose on his lapel. Just saying. And for the record, if Craig M hadn't been sent packing, I didn't want to watch it anymore. (Notice I didn't say I wouldn't watch it anymore, but I really wouldn't want to.)
Anyway, speaking of Jonathan . . . he's a local weatherman for me. I've never seen him do the weather report - I watch another station - but I live in the Houston area so, he's local. Having seen him on this show though, I can say with a certainty that I don't believe I will ever deliberately watch his weather report. He isn't as scary as Craig M (I agree that he's dangerous) but he is kind of creepy, if you ask me.
After the first show I decided that Ty was a front runner on my list, mostly because of his love of his dog. But, I agree with whichever one of the guys that made the comment about the guitar playing and the show. It needs to stop. So, Ty, if you're listening, lay off on the guitar playing, k? Otherwise you're off my list. And please, whatever you do, don't sing again. Thanks.
Oh, and who do you think it is (seen in the previews last week) that Ali gets upset with and goes on about all she's put on the line? I think it's Roberto. I think that mainly because it seems she's got more of a thing for him and, at least at this point, is the one who would hurt her the most. But that's just what I'm thinking now. It could change next week.
So, are you watching this season and who do you think - based on what you've seen so far - Ali will pick? Right now I would say Roberto and Frank have the best shot at it, based on what I've seen. I'm still rooting for Ty though, provided he ditches the guitar. ;o)
And one last thing, I don't want to know how things end for the show. Half the fun for me is speculating and trying to figure out what's going to happen and seeing if I'm right. So if you've been to sites that tell how the whole season wraps up, please don't spoil it 'cause I'd really like to watch it unfold each week. Thanks. :o)
Showing posts with label The Bachelors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Bachelors. Show all posts
Monday, May 31, 2010
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Back in the Saddle Again
For some unknown reason I tend to get crushes on the most inappropriate men. Last year it was a married man. This year it's someone who is, quite literally, half my age. Aside from the fact there are just some things he may want to experience that I may not be able or want to, knowing that I had been married two years when he was born provides enough of an ick factor for me that I'm trying to divert my attention - much like I did last year - again.
Which is why I joined another online dating service a few weeks ago. I think it's a newer one and I don't know of anyone who has previously used this service. But, it's associated with a known service (that I had eliminated as a possible service I would use) that others I know have used - and loved.
Can someone please explain to me why I keep doing this to myself because I just don't get it. I also don't get some of the guys on there.
Like the one that says he has an "athletic/toned" body with pictures that show a beer gut plain as day.
Or the one whose picture is taken of him from the bridge of his nose up. Yes, there are other pictures of him in the profile but seriously, why include that one?
Then there's the one that says "I'm 55 but don't look it". Um, you're right, you don't...you look much, much older than that sorry to say.
There was one who "channeled" his deceased mother for the profile saying something like "I never know what to say on these profiles so I thought I'd 'interview' my mother for this one." And then proceeds to "ask" his mother questions and have her answer them - about him. I thought it was a little strange but decided to look at it as creative and humorous and I communicated with him for a little while. He became obsessive about communicating offline and pictures. So, when I sent him a link to see a picture of me, he closed the communication because he was suddenly "pursuing another relationship". Should've followed my first instinct on that one.
And in a "drapes don't match the carpet" kind of way, one listed himself as having red hair. Now, I guess you just have to take that on faith because, while I didn't see his "carpet", the man had no drapes, so to speak. Dude, you're bald! If you don't want people to know that up front, then don't post your picture!
Of course I still get the geographically undesirable matches with people in other states. The service has a drop down list of reasons you're closing a match, which they say they will use to better match you in the future. But let's start with the fact that I have that my matches must be within 25 miles (the shortest distance allowed on the site) and they're matching me with people in Louisiana - again. I marked "physical distance is too great" (120 miles away) as the reason I was closing the match. So what do they do? They match me with someone in Fort Worth, Texas because, I guess they think if they keep it in the state of Texas it's acceptable? Uh, excuse me but Fort Worth is roughly 285 miles away. If Lake Charles is too far away, why would Fort Worth be acceptable?
And lastly, there was a match with someone I think I know...again. I can't quite place him but I'm pretty sure I know him from somewhere else. I mentioned this to him and he said it could be from another site. I looked at the site he mentioned and I'm pretty sure that's not it. So, it's got me to thinking that the people they're thinking are the best matches for me are people I rejected in my past. And if I rejected them in the past, why would I want to be matched up with them now?
But the good news is, it's working at getting my mind off my totally inappropriate crush (heretofore to be known as TIC).
Which is why I joined another online dating service a few weeks ago. I think it's a newer one and I don't know of anyone who has previously used this service. But, it's associated with a known service (that I had eliminated as a possible service I would use) that others I know have used - and loved.
Can someone please explain to me why I keep doing this to myself because I just don't get it. I also don't get some of the guys on there.
Like the one that says he has an "athletic/toned" body with pictures that show a beer gut plain as day.
Or the one whose picture is taken of him from the bridge of his nose up. Yes, there are other pictures of him in the profile but seriously, why include that one?
Then there's the one that says "I'm 55 but don't look it". Um, you're right, you don't...you look much, much older than that sorry to say.
There was one who "channeled" his deceased mother for the profile saying something like "I never know what to say on these profiles so I thought I'd 'interview' my mother for this one." And then proceeds to "ask" his mother questions and have her answer them - about him. I thought it was a little strange but decided to look at it as creative and humorous and I communicated with him for a little while. He became obsessive about communicating offline and pictures. So, when I sent him a link to see a picture of me, he closed the communication because he was suddenly "pursuing another relationship". Should've followed my first instinct on that one.
And in a "drapes don't match the carpet" kind of way, one listed himself as having red hair. Now, I guess you just have to take that on faith because, while I didn't see his "carpet", the man had no drapes, so to speak. Dude, you're bald! If you don't want people to know that up front, then don't post your picture!
Of course I still get the geographically undesirable matches with people in other states. The service has a drop down list of reasons you're closing a match, which they say they will use to better match you in the future. But let's start with the fact that I have that my matches must be within 25 miles (the shortest distance allowed on the site) and they're matching me with people in Louisiana - again. I marked "physical distance is too great" (120 miles away) as the reason I was closing the match. So what do they do? They match me with someone in Fort Worth, Texas because, I guess they think if they keep it in the state of Texas it's acceptable? Uh, excuse me but Fort Worth is roughly 285 miles away. If Lake Charles is too far away, why would Fort Worth be acceptable?
And lastly, there was a match with someone I think I know...again. I can't quite place him but I'm pretty sure I know him from somewhere else. I mentioned this to him and he said it could be from another site. I looked at the site he mentioned and I'm pretty sure that's not it. So, it's got me to thinking that the people they're thinking are the best matches for me are people I rejected in my past. And if I rejected them in the past, why would I want to be matched up with them now?
But the good news is, it's working at getting my mind off my totally inappropriate crush (heretofore to be known as TIC).
Friday, November 28, 2008
Confession Time
As most of you know, I did the online dating thing this past summer. The purpose was to keep me "entertained" during the summer, when I wasn't too busy with classes. If something happened, great. If not, it wasn't a big deal. Well, the experience wasn't all that exciting. The only person I actually "met" from there (or even took it beyond talking on the online website) was the guy I knew before I got married. I haven't seen him since the alcohol enhanced meeting. So really no activity came from that.
But, since I seemed to have 3 extra minutes a week (after work, school and now the marathon training), I started thinking about giving it another shot. When I got the letter offering me three months for the price of one, I took them up on it.
And then it hit me. I signed up for this during the holiday season! So not cool. My membership expires a couple of days before Valentine's day. Completely uncool! I'm not a Ms Lonely Hearts and I certainly don't want to meet a Mr. Lonely Heart so I'm thinking I'm just wasting another three months membership. Oh well.
Anyway, there was one match that looked promising - at first. He's a firefighter. His profile looked really good. And then I looked at his pictures. Now, normally I'd be all over someone who judged a person based on their pictures (or lack thereof) but this was different - hear me out.
There were six photos total. Only one was of Mr. Firefighter. The other five were of his kids (one was in there twice so really only four other different pictures). First one was of his son and daughter together - it was sweet. Next two were of his son alone. Last one was of his son too. He was standing by an ice chest of sorts - and he was proudly holding a deer's head, with another one visible in the ice chest.
Now, I'm not a vegetarian but I never knowingly eat deer meat. I'm not judging those that do, it's just not for me. I'm also not judging those that hunt, but again, it's not for me. And, honestly, I think I would have been okay with him being a hunter, who eats deer meat, if we'd met, but it was shocking to see that picture with his profile.
I wanted to be open-minded though, so I didn't automatically close the match - I wanted to think on it a while. Then, I got a "communication" from the guy, asking me to share my pictures (I did finally post one but it's not open for all to see automatically). Hmmm, so he wants to see my picture before he does any further communication, does he? That suggests he's going to judge me on my picture maybe? Well, if that's the case and he was going to judge me on my picture, I decided it was okay to judge him on the one he posted - of the dead deer head.
Match closed.
But, since I seemed to have 3 extra minutes a week (after work, school and now the marathon training), I started thinking about giving it another shot. When I got the letter offering me three months for the price of one, I took them up on it.
And then it hit me. I signed up for this during the holiday season! So not cool. My membership expires a couple of days before Valentine's day. Completely uncool! I'm not a Ms Lonely Hearts and I certainly don't want to meet a Mr. Lonely Heart so I'm thinking I'm just wasting another three months membership. Oh well.
Anyway, there was one match that looked promising - at first. He's a firefighter. His profile looked really good. And then I looked at his pictures. Now, normally I'd be all over someone who judged a person based on their pictures (or lack thereof) but this was different - hear me out.
There were six photos total. Only one was of Mr. Firefighter. The other five were of his kids (one was in there twice so really only four other different pictures). First one was of his son and daughter together - it was sweet. Next two were of his son alone. Last one was of his son too. He was standing by an ice chest of sorts - and he was proudly holding a deer's head, with another one visible in the ice chest.
Now, I'm not a vegetarian but I never knowingly eat deer meat. I'm not judging those that do, it's just not for me. I'm also not judging those that hunt, but again, it's not for me. And, honestly, I think I would have been okay with him being a hunter, who eats deer meat, if we'd met, but it was shocking to see that picture with his profile.
I wanted to be open-minded though, so I didn't automatically close the match - I wanted to think on it a while. Then, I got a "communication" from the guy, asking me to share my pictures (I did finally post one but it's not open for all to see automatically). Hmmm, so he wants to see my picture before he does any further communication, does he? That suggests he's going to judge me on my picture maybe? Well, if that's the case and he was going to judge me on my picture, I decided it was okay to judge him on the one he posted - of the dead deer head.
Match closed.
Saturday, July 05, 2008
Lasting Relationships
A long, long time ago I heard (or was told) that women set the tone of a romantic relationship. For example, if the guy starts out by walking on her and she just takes it from him, she's setting herself up to be treated that way for the rest of the relationship - however long it may last. If, down the line, she decides she's had enough, the man it taken aback and balks at it because he can't understand why something he's been doing from day one is suddenly a problem. He'll tell the woman she's the problem and probably convince her of that. I think I read somewhere that, statistically, married men lived longer than single men and single women lived longer than married women. Why is that? Someone said it was because the men were sucking the life out of the women but, well...
For the most part, I really like being single. I don't have to account to another human being for my actions. I can come and go as I please. I can spend my income any way I choose. I just have a lot of freedom. And I enjoy that.
On the other hand, when things aren't perfect and I need help, there's just me to figure things out. When things get bad at work and I'd rather ram sharp objects in my eyes while crawling over red-hot coals on my stomach, I have to suck it up and go into the office because working is not an option for me - I have to work.
All this is leading up to reunion guy (Don) and my online dating experience. Last weekend I was a bit giddy about having been "reunited" with Don. It was a lot of fun discussing old times and how we each perceived things. I felt completely at ease with him - totally comfortable. He gave me his phone number and email address. I felt comfortable emailing him from my personal email - I didn't create a phony one for this purpose. I didn't immediately offer up my phone number though, because he didn't ask for it. I also had no intention of calling him - I was raised that you don't call men, and for the most part I don't.
At the urging of many people, I finally offered up my home number to him without his asking for it. (I gave him the home number because any other number and he could/would be calling me at work and things are just too busy there for that now.) I also threw something in that email saying something to the effect of that we'd covered enough ancient history and asked about his life over the last 25 years. I specifically told him that I'd love to hear about his wife (who passed away a couple of years ago) and daughter, if he was comfortable talking about them. Yet, he seems stuck in the past. The only things I've learned about Don and the past 25 years is that his wife passed away, that he has a daughter and that he's working for a chemical company - and I learned all that from his profile. The only new information I've gotten from him is the name of the company he works for and I only got that because he sent me email from his work!
He keeps bringing up my marriage. I shared with him some of the things my ex and I went through before we got married and why I still married him, despite having doubts about him - and he seems to be focusing on that. Seems to be looking at it as I'm broken now and need to be fixed - and that he's the one to fix me. First email like that had me responding with "let me just clarify" and I proceeded to explain that I was giving him an example - not complaining about my life. He responded with something that came across like maybe I was in denial - but he could help with that. My reaction was to back way off.
He informed me that he was going to call me Wednesday evening - or at least try to. I wasn't at all upset when he didn't. I got an email from him Thursday suggesting he might call that night (he didn't come right out and say that but I got that from the email), so I came home from work and unplugged my phone. Then, about 9:15 Thursday night, I got an email from him telling me to get ready for his call, which would be coming soon. Normally, the time would tick me off but he was at work and I totally get that. No, my problem was that he just expected me to be home waiting for his email and call. Totally ticked me off.
He sent an email yesterday morning saying he'd tried to call and asked when he could call during the day yesterday - and could we meet up today. I responded, letting him know that I had unplugged my phone and intended to stay home this weekend, relaxing. I think I was pretty nice about it while also getting my point across - I wasn't going to see him this weekend. I got an email from him this morning telling me he wouldn't have been able to see me today anyway. It came across as his idea. Whatever. He also asked, again, when he can call. I haven't responded.
Then there's his pictures. He looks old. I know that shouldn't matter, but it does - apparently. I showed them to a couple of friends of mine (including SCG - yes I told him everything . . . everything) and they all think he looks about 20 years older than I do. That's a problem for me, for so many reasons. But, a good friend and SCG both think I should still give him a chance. Why? I have no idea.
Meanwhile, I'm wondering what it will cost to have my home number and email address changed...
For the most part, I really like being single. I don't have to account to another human being for my actions. I can come and go as I please. I can spend my income any way I choose. I just have a lot of freedom. And I enjoy that.
On the other hand, when things aren't perfect and I need help, there's just me to figure things out. When things get bad at work and I'd rather ram sharp objects in my eyes while crawling over red-hot coals on my stomach, I have to suck it up and go into the office because working is not an option for me - I have to work.
All this is leading up to reunion guy (Don) and my online dating experience. Last weekend I was a bit giddy about having been "reunited" with Don. It was a lot of fun discussing old times and how we each perceived things. I felt completely at ease with him - totally comfortable. He gave me his phone number and email address. I felt comfortable emailing him from my personal email - I didn't create a phony one for this purpose. I didn't immediately offer up my phone number though, because he didn't ask for it. I also had no intention of calling him - I was raised that you don't call men, and for the most part I don't.
At the urging of many people, I finally offered up my home number to him without his asking for it. (I gave him the home number because any other number and he could/would be calling me at work and things are just too busy there for that now.) I also threw something in that email saying something to the effect of that we'd covered enough ancient history and asked about his life over the last 25 years. I specifically told him that I'd love to hear about his wife (who passed away a couple of years ago) and daughter, if he was comfortable talking about them. Yet, he seems stuck in the past. The only things I've learned about Don and the past 25 years is that his wife passed away, that he has a daughter and that he's working for a chemical company - and I learned all that from his profile. The only new information I've gotten from him is the name of the company he works for and I only got that because he sent me email from his work!
He keeps bringing up my marriage. I shared with him some of the things my ex and I went through before we got married and why I still married him, despite having doubts about him - and he seems to be focusing on that. Seems to be looking at it as I'm broken now and need to be fixed - and that he's the one to fix me. First email like that had me responding with "let me just clarify" and I proceeded to explain that I was giving him an example - not complaining about my life. He responded with something that came across like maybe I was in denial - but he could help with that. My reaction was to back way off.
He informed me that he was going to call me Wednesday evening - or at least try to. I wasn't at all upset when he didn't. I got an email from him Thursday suggesting he might call that night (he didn't come right out and say that but I got that from the email), so I came home from work and unplugged my phone. Then, about 9:15 Thursday night, I got an email from him telling me to get ready for his call, which would be coming soon. Normally, the time would tick me off but he was at work and I totally get that. No, my problem was that he just expected me to be home waiting for his email and call. Totally ticked me off.
He sent an email yesterday morning saying he'd tried to call and asked when he could call during the day yesterday - and could we meet up today. I responded, letting him know that I had unplugged my phone and intended to stay home this weekend, relaxing. I think I was pretty nice about it while also getting my point across - I wasn't going to see him this weekend. I got an email from him this morning telling me he wouldn't have been able to see me today anyway. It came across as his idea. Whatever. He also asked, again, when he can call. I haven't responded.
Then there's his pictures. He looks old. I know that shouldn't matter, but it does - apparently. I showed them to a couple of friends of mine (including SCG - yes I told him everything . . . everything) and they all think he looks about 20 years older than I do. That's a problem for me, for so many reasons. But, a good friend and SCG both think I should still give him a chance. Why? I have no idea.
Meanwhile, I'm wondering what it will cost to have my home number and email address changed...
Saturday, June 28, 2008
In Shock!
I told a friend of mine yesterday that I'd blog about an eHarmony discovery I made. I didn't blog about it last night because, well, I was re-reading old posts to see if I needed to delete and/or amend any posts before I gave it out to someone (from eHarmony) who'd trusted me with their myspace information. And well, since this has always been a "secret" blog, I've kind of been pretty open on it so I wasn't sure if I should give it out "as is", if you know what I mean. I read about a year's worth of posts and didn't see anything I thought was particularly bad (although I do know of one dated further back that I wouldn't necessarily show this person).
I didn't post this morning because I was too busy replying to an email from this person. But I'm here now.
Anyway, remember eHarmony match Don? The one I thought I might know? It is him! At each step I worried that he would close the match before I found out for certain but I decided that, no matter what, I had to be honest in my answers (although I did keep in mind that I might know this person). As things progressed I thought to myself that if it wasn't the Don I knew, it was a Don I thought I wanted to get to know. So either way, I didn't want the match to be closed.
Thing was, he always seemed to take a few days to respond to things so it seemed like it was really going slow. I guess I had posed some questions to him and was waiting on a response when he gave me a photo nudge without responding to the questions. I thought the match might get closed at that point because it seems to be pretty important to some of the guys on there. And in case I haven't mentioned it before, I put in my profile that I don't have a picture to post so if someone wanted to close a match based on that, it was okay with me because they wouldn't be a good fit for me anyway - words to that effect. My response, though, was to give him a photo nudge. He has photos posted but to be shown "at a later stage" (we've exchanged email addresses and I still can't see them!). I guess he got the message because he responded to the questions and we progressed from there.
At the open-ended questions phase, I asked him about his extended family and what holidays were like. I figured his answer would give me a better idea whether it was the Don I thought it was or not. I was all but convinced by his response but there was a sliver of doubt there. I asked a couple of friends of mine what they thought - whether I should ask him or not tell him I suspected I knew him. They didn't think I should ask but I felt it would be dishonest to not ask. I didn't want to play games. Figured the worst thing that would happen is he would close the match - without answering!
Since I've already mentioned that it is him and that we've exchanged email addresses, I think it's safe to assume he responded to me. It's been fun catching up with an old friend. It's been hysterical to hear how we viewed things that happened differently. I just found out yesterday that it was him but we've exchanged a couple of long emails and I guess it seems longer. Plus, it almost feels like no time has passed since we were last spoke (a hundred years ago!). It's just kind of weird but I can't stop smiling. :)
I didn't post this morning because I was too busy replying to an email from this person. But I'm here now.
Anyway, remember eHarmony match Don? The one I thought I might know? It is him! At each step I worried that he would close the match before I found out for certain but I decided that, no matter what, I had to be honest in my answers (although I did keep in mind that I might know this person). As things progressed I thought to myself that if it wasn't the Don I knew, it was a Don I thought I wanted to get to know. So either way, I didn't want the match to be closed.
Thing was, he always seemed to take a few days to respond to things so it seemed like it was really going slow. I guess I had posed some questions to him and was waiting on a response when he gave me a photo nudge without responding to the questions. I thought the match might get closed at that point because it seems to be pretty important to some of the guys on there. And in case I haven't mentioned it before, I put in my profile that I don't have a picture to post so if someone wanted to close a match based on that, it was okay with me because they wouldn't be a good fit for me anyway - words to that effect. My response, though, was to give him a photo nudge. He has photos posted but to be shown "at a later stage" (we've exchanged email addresses and I still can't see them!). I guess he got the message because he responded to the questions and we progressed from there.
At the open-ended questions phase, I asked him about his extended family and what holidays were like. I figured his answer would give me a better idea whether it was the Don I thought it was or not. I was all but convinced by his response but there was a sliver of doubt there. I asked a couple of friends of mine what they thought - whether I should ask him or not tell him I suspected I knew him. They didn't think I should ask but I felt it would be dishonest to not ask. I didn't want to play games. Figured the worst thing that would happen is he would close the match - without answering!
Since I've already mentioned that it is him and that we've exchanged email addresses, I think it's safe to assume he responded to me. It's been fun catching up with an old friend. It's been hysterical to hear how we viewed things that happened differently. I just found out yesterday that it was him but we've exchanged a couple of long emails and I guess it seems longer. Plus, it almost feels like no time has passed since we were last spoke (a hundred years ago!). It's just kind of weird but I can't stop smiling. :)
Sunday, June 15, 2008
The blog about nothing
Remember the Seinfeld episode where Elaine invited George's girlfriend to the movie? George was upset because his two "worlds" were colliding. Well, I have a similar situation going on at work. See, I used to talk about my friends from law to my friends in engineering and vice versa. Then recently part of my group moved their offices down by law AND a friend of mine from law came upstairs to my area and met SCG. Worlds are colliding!!!
Speaking of work, things are not much better there and I'm picking up old habits. You know, of the eating-under-stress variety. I've gained ten pounds in the last month. I still went to Weight Watchers though (and had to pay) because I figured if I was having to pay for it, I'd get more motivated to get the weight back off.
And since we're talking about getting the weight back off, I should mention that I've been going to the gym the last few days (7-day free pass to 24-hour fitness gym). Water aerobics and yoga may look like wimpy classes but they both kicked my rear! The step-aerobic class I took this morning had less of an impact than they did. I'm thinking of joining for the summer, since I don't anticipate having a lot of time in the fall - what with school and all. The company I work for gets a good discount on memberships.
This online dating thing is going slow. I guess it was last weekend that I decided to take the bull by the horns and quit waiting for things to happen. I went through the 50+ "matches" that were open and either closed them or sent out questions. I've only heard back from two or three - one of which closed the match because they were pursuing another relationship. One of the ones I closed replied back that they thought we had potential and wanted me to reconsider. I re-read his profile and I only see two things that would have made me close the match - but one was a biggie. And there is one match who I think I may know:
Don is a 50 year old laboratory analyst - the age fits. We went to the same church (it's a huge church so that doesn't guarantee that I know him). He was married for 23 years when his wife passed away last year - which would be about right (length of marriage, that is) if it were who I think it is. He did mission work - again fits the man I know. Where he lives fits, as do his answers to my questions. He has pictures but they haven't been released for me to view yet so... Oh and if it is the guy I think it is, we went out once many, many years ago. I thought it was a "as friends" thing but, apparently, he thought it was a "date". We had a very nice time but he never "invited" me out like that again. After I married (anniversary was 25 years ago this past Wednesday), I saw him and he confessed to me that he'd had strong feelings for me. I don't think I ever suspected that but I do know that when he told me I'd wished I'd known at the time because he was such a good guy. Meanwhile, I'm just waiting for the time when I know for sure if this the same Don or not.
So, those are some things going on in my world. What's going on in yours?
Speaking of work, things are not much better there and I'm picking up old habits. You know, of the eating-under-stress variety. I've gained ten pounds in the last month. I still went to Weight Watchers though (and had to pay) because I figured if I was having to pay for it, I'd get more motivated to get the weight back off.
And since we're talking about getting the weight back off, I should mention that I've been going to the gym the last few days (7-day free pass to 24-hour fitness gym). Water aerobics and yoga may look like wimpy classes but they both kicked my rear! The step-aerobic class I took this morning had less of an impact than they did. I'm thinking of joining for the summer, since I don't anticipate having a lot of time in the fall - what with school and all. The company I work for gets a good discount on memberships.
This online dating thing is going slow. I guess it was last weekend that I decided to take the bull by the horns and quit waiting for things to happen. I went through the 50+ "matches" that were open and either closed them or sent out questions. I've only heard back from two or three - one of which closed the match because they were pursuing another relationship. One of the ones I closed replied back that they thought we had potential and wanted me to reconsider. I re-read his profile and I only see two things that would have made me close the match - but one was a biggie. And there is one match who I think I may know:
Don is a 50 year old laboratory analyst - the age fits. We went to the same church (it's a huge church so that doesn't guarantee that I know him). He was married for 23 years when his wife passed away last year - which would be about right (length of marriage, that is) if it were who I think it is. He did mission work - again fits the man I know. Where he lives fits, as do his answers to my questions. He has pictures but they haven't been released for me to view yet so... Oh and if it is the guy I think it is, we went out once many, many years ago. I thought it was a "as friends" thing but, apparently, he thought it was a "date". We had a very nice time but he never "invited" me out like that again. After I married (anniversary was 25 years ago this past Wednesday), I saw him and he confessed to me that he'd had strong feelings for me. I don't think I ever suspected that but I do know that when he told me I'd wished I'd known at the time because he was such a good guy. Meanwhile, I'm just waiting for the time when I know for sure if this the same Don or not.
So, those are some things going on in my world. What's going on in yours?
Monday, May 26, 2008
All in the name of Research
I promise not to have daily updates on the online dating but, well, I am an official member now. I signed up for a three month membership. It will run out about the time school starts back up for me and I figure if nothing develops before then that I won't have time to continue. So I'm giving myself three months of "fun", if that's what you want to call it.
I've "closed" several more matches today. One had looked pretty promising on his profile - he said he loves dogs and just lost his dog, who was 17 years old. Plus he had a little country place that he likes to hang out it. It sounded good.
Until he got to the questions.
He only wants one night a week to himself...less time - way less time - than I want for myself.
I asked the premarital sex question of him and he wrote in "the last three". The only other option was "I'm completely opposed to it".
When asked if he dominated his relationships he said yes - translation: control freak, which is a total "no way in hell" for me.
Yet, I STILL moved on to the must haves/can't stands stage of the program, but only after I reminded myself of his love of dogs and his country place. lol
As for his must haves/can't stands, they reinforced my belief that he is a control freak and only wants someone whose world will revolve around him and his desires. Anyone who wants to have their own life or wants their needs and desires met will not be compatible for him.
Mark that one CLOSED as of 8:15 a.m. today.
Aside from that, I want to know why someone would include their official arrest mug shots as their photos. Seriously, now that I'm able to view pictures I have to wonder what these people think! And do the guys who include pictures of themselves with other women think that's appealing? I just want to say it looks like they have enough women in their lives already and I'm not willing to become part of their harem.
It's going to be an interesting three months.
Oh, and P.S. I'm a redhead, as of yesterday. ;-)
I've "closed" several more matches today. One had looked pretty promising on his profile - he said he loves dogs and just lost his dog, who was 17 years old. Plus he had a little country place that he likes to hang out it. It sounded good.
Until he got to the questions.
He only wants one night a week to himself...less time - way less time - than I want for myself.
I asked the premarital sex question of him and he wrote in "the last three". The only other option was "I'm completely opposed to it".
When asked if he dominated his relationships he said yes - translation: control freak, which is a total "no way in hell" for me.
Yet, I STILL moved on to the must haves/can't stands stage of the program, but only after I reminded myself of his love of dogs and his country place. lol
As for his must haves/can't stands, they reinforced my belief that he is a control freak and only wants someone whose world will revolve around him and his desires. Anyone who wants to have their own life or wants their needs and desires met will not be compatible for him.
Mark that one CLOSED as of 8:15 a.m. today.
Aside from that, I want to know why someone would include their official arrest mug shots as their photos. Seriously, now that I'm able to view pictures I have to wonder what these people think! And do the guys who include pictures of themselves with other women think that's appealing? I just want to say it looks like they have enough women in their lives already and I'm not willing to become part of their harem.
It's going to be an interesting three months.
Oh, and P.S. I'm a redhead, as of yesterday. ;-)
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Meet the Bachelors
Bachelor #1
Jerry is a 47 year old Computer Technician and Export Manager
Jerry is the bachelor that made the crack about romance novels I mentioned a couple of posts ago. Even with the comment, I decided not to write him off immediately - I wanted to keep an open mind. So we went through the initial questions.
In response to my question regarding personal space, he said when he was at work was all the "down time" he needed - he wanted to spend the rest of his time with his partner. Uh, wrong answer for this girl! But, his dream getaway is a cottage by the sea. Made up some points with that. So we moved on to round 2...must haves and can't stands.
Let's just say he has high expectations for his partner and it doesn't seem like he's willing to give anything back.
The match was officially "closed" as of May 24, 2008, 12:44 p.m. (by me)
Bachelor #2
TOMMIE (how he was listed - in all caps) is 51 and retired - from what, I have no idea
One of TOMMIE's life skills is managing his finances (which could explain how he can be retired at 51).
His answers to my questions revealed that he is mostly serious but enjoys the occasional laugh. Okay, so not working for me as I love to laugh as much as possible - but, still keeping an open mind. But more on that in a minute.
We moved on to must haves and can't stands.
TOMMIE must have someone with a sense of humor. Yes, the guy who is mostly serious must have a woman with a sense of humor. (Note to TOMMIE, LUCY likes consistency!)
Nevertheless, we moved on to the second set of questions which we get to write ourselves, rather than draw from a list (although a list is available and I did use it).
In the question where I asked what one event in his life did he most regret he gave me a one sentence reply and then went on to give me his email and phone number, ask what I look like and tell me that he's only on the program through Monday.
Yet, I still agreed to move on to Open Communication (which is still anonymous through the website).
After a couple of emails (did I mention that he can't spell and his grammar is atrocious - who knew it would be so important to me!) of him begging me to call and/or email him, the match was officially "closed" by me on May 24, 2008 at 1:42 p.m.
Next up we have Bachelor #3
Jerry is a 61 year old Sales Rep.
Now, I have to be honest his age is a put off for me but I'm really trying to be open-minded here. However, the Sales Rep thing is even a bigger deal than the age...I don't much care for salesmen. But being open-minded and all, I answered his questions and then asked my own.
I asked how many years he had lived alone and he responded with his phone number and said he'd be leaving the service soon. Apparently he misunderstood how the question and answer thing worked!
Premarital sex? A part of the dating process.
Opinion on mate having opposite sex friends? Basically, only if any and all socializing is done in his presence.
The match was officially closed May 24, 2008 at 2:11 p.m.
Bachelor #4
David is a 42 year old truck driver. Okay, I've heard enough stories about truck drivers that I'm skeptical but still (for whatever reason) open-minded. He'd sent me an "icebreaker" and I reciprocated. Then the questions started.
I asked what his opinion of the traditional gender roles were, he basically said he was for them. Uh, wrong answer.
Premarital sex? He has no problem with it.
Laughter? Mostly serious with the occasional laugh.
Financially? He's cheap (paraphrasing here).
Opposite sex friendships? Not only does he think it's okay, he thinks they both should actively pursue them. Hmmm, I was asking because I have male friends and I don't anyone telling me I shouldn't (my ex did that and I regret that I let him talk me out of being friends with my friends) - but actively pursuing them? I don't know.
Still, I moved on to the must haves and can't stands. In a nutshell, he's looking for someone to take care of him and be his sex slave.
Match officially closed today at 3:46 p.m.
I have three others that are in the communication stage, one of which requested we "fast track" the communications (meaning you skip the questions and must haves/can't stands and go straight to open - anonymous - communication). He did this when we got to the "open question" phase and I directed a question to his "can't stands" (he can't stand gamblers and I love Las Vegas - even though I'm not really a gambler). I declined his fast track because I want him to answer the question at hand. I'm still waiting to see if he's okay with the decline.
There are two others that I've sent icebreakers to that seem promising but you never know. I guess time will tell.
Jerry is a 47 year old Computer Technician and Export Manager
Jerry is the bachelor that made the crack about romance novels I mentioned a couple of posts ago. Even with the comment, I decided not to write him off immediately - I wanted to keep an open mind. So we went through the initial questions.
In response to my question regarding personal space, he said when he was at work was all the "down time" he needed - he wanted to spend the rest of his time with his partner. Uh, wrong answer for this girl! But, his dream getaway is a cottage by the sea. Made up some points with that. So we moved on to round 2...must haves and can't stands.
Let's just say he has high expectations for his partner and it doesn't seem like he's willing to give anything back.
The match was officially "closed" as of May 24, 2008, 12:44 p.m. (by me)
Bachelor #2
TOMMIE (how he was listed - in all caps) is 51 and retired - from what, I have no idea
One of TOMMIE's life skills is managing his finances (which could explain how he can be retired at 51).
His answers to my questions revealed that he is mostly serious but enjoys the occasional laugh. Okay, so not working for me as I love to laugh as much as possible - but, still keeping an open mind. But more on that in a minute.
We moved on to must haves and can't stands.
TOMMIE must have someone with a sense of humor. Yes, the guy who is mostly serious must have a woman with a sense of humor. (Note to TOMMIE, LUCY likes consistency!)
Nevertheless, we moved on to the second set of questions which we get to write ourselves, rather than draw from a list (although a list is available and I did use it).
In the question where I asked what one event in his life did he most regret he gave me a one sentence reply and then went on to give me his email and phone number, ask what I look like and tell me that he's only on the program through Monday.
Yet, I still agreed to move on to Open Communication (which is still anonymous through the website).
After a couple of emails (did I mention that he can't spell and his grammar is atrocious - who knew it would be so important to me!) of him begging me to call and/or email him, the match was officially "closed" by me on May 24, 2008 at 1:42 p.m.
Next up we have Bachelor #3
Jerry is a 61 year old Sales Rep.
Now, I have to be honest his age is a put off for me but I'm really trying to be open-minded here. However, the Sales Rep thing is even a bigger deal than the age...I don't much care for salesmen. But being open-minded and all, I answered his questions and then asked my own.
I asked how many years he had lived alone and he responded with his phone number and said he'd be leaving the service soon. Apparently he misunderstood how the question and answer thing worked!
Premarital sex? A part of the dating process.
Opinion on mate having opposite sex friends? Basically, only if any and all socializing is done in his presence.
The match was officially closed May 24, 2008 at 2:11 p.m.
Bachelor #4
David is a 42 year old truck driver. Okay, I've heard enough stories about truck drivers that I'm skeptical but still (for whatever reason) open-minded. He'd sent me an "icebreaker" and I reciprocated. Then the questions started.
I asked what his opinion of the traditional gender roles were, he basically said he was for them. Uh, wrong answer.
Premarital sex? He has no problem with it.
Laughter? Mostly serious with the occasional laugh.
Financially? He's cheap (paraphrasing here).
Opposite sex friendships? Not only does he think it's okay, he thinks they both should actively pursue them. Hmmm, I was asking because I have male friends and I don't anyone telling me I shouldn't (my ex did that and I regret that I let him talk me out of being friends with my friends) - but actively pursuing them? I don't know.
Still, I moved on to the must haves and can't stands. In a nutshell, he's looking for someone to take care of him and be his sex slave.
Match officially closed today at 3:46 p.m.
I have three others that are in the communication stage, one of which requested we "fast track" the communications (meaning you skip the questions and must haves/can't stands and go straight to open - anonymous - communication). He did this when we got to the "open question" phase and I directed a question to his "can't stands" (he can't stand gamblers and I love Las Vegas - even though I'm not really a gambler). I declined his fast track because I want him to answer the question at hand. I'm still waiting to see if he's okay with the decline.
There are two others that I've sent icebreakers to that seem promising but you never know. I guess time will tell.
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